Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Baking is Scandalous, duh.

My friends and I like to get into a little trouble every now and again. It’s always wise to keep in mind that you never want to start too much trouble. As my mother recently reminded me, she will only help me out with legal problems once in my life, so it is important to save that for when I decide to do something truly scandalous, like beat in someone’s mailbox or something. So, with that in mind, here's one of my favorite ways to be a little bit scandalous, without going over the edge: bake! My friends and I were first inspired by one of the greatest books ever written: a treasure called I Like You: Hospitality Under the Influence by Amy Sedaris. This book is one of the best guides ever on  how to host a party. While my friends and I didn’t ever actually host a party, we did make a lot of cakes. We started off with a squirrel cake and escalated into making a band aid cake, a foot cake, an ear cake, a bacon and egg cake, a t-bone steak cake, a heroin cake, and many more. I know like this may sound like a daunting task, but don’t worry, I’m here to help you out with some helpful hints.

  1. Never make your own cake, use the boxed kind. They’re better. Trust me.
  2. Pick whatever style cake you want, but sometimes it’s fun to mix things up. (Use red velvet cake for a t-bone steak cake… it’ll make it look more real!)
  3. Bake your cake in a square or rectangular shape first, worry about your final cake shape after it’s done cooking.
  4. Draw out a sketch of your desired design on a piece of paper, trace it onto your cooked cake, and cut.
  5. Make a color scheme. Dye vanilla and chocolate icings accordingly. Thats what food color was made for people!
  6.  Begin painting on that icing! Once the cake is cut and your colors are decided upon, use whatever tools you have to delicately paint on the icing to give your cake that one of a kind look.
  7. Enjoy!

No comments: